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Prenuptial agreement (also known as a premarital agreement or a prenup) is aimed at making a marital relationship stronger, while protecting the best interests of both spouses in the event of a divorce in future. Unfortunately, the discussion revolving prenups can often result in resentment and stress and raise doubts in an otherwise healthy and loving relationship.
Mediations can be useful in upholding the right perspective in a prenuptial agreement, and facilitating the many difficult discussions regarding a potential divorce (that actually may or may never happen in the future.)
It’s a misconception that couples discussing prenuptial agreements are less satisfied in their relationships today or are predicting an imminent dissolution of their marriage. In reality, they are mature couples who want to build a healthy relationship on a rock solid and transparent foundation so that there are no discords or disagreements later. Having a mutually acceptable prenup creates a level of predictability and resilience in the marriage.
At the Lerner Conflict Resolution Center, we believe in the efficacy of having a mutually acceptable mediation framework that can be used for jointly determining relationship circumstances rather than dealing with outcomes imposed by lawyers and courts – after the fact. You may not be aware of the legal effects of the numerous actions and inactions that tend to occur after entering a formal marital relationship.
In the absence of an enforceable expression of shared intent, you both may be left scrambling to gain the upper hand over the other in case of a conflict. The fact that California family law is exceedingly complex doesn’t help matters. Family law in California is forever evolving which is a recipe for emotional and financial disaster when a relationship ends.
You and your spouse can use the expertise, knowledge, skills, and impartiality of a neutral third-party mediator to outline, develop, and create a premarital agreement.
An attorney’s everyday role is to advocate for one side against the other. They generally tend to become adversarial by nature in their everyday lives by virtue of that. Using an attorney may cause you and your spouse to become combative or work against each other. This is not something you want in the days leading up to your marriage, which should technically be filled with joy and excitement.
In fact, many couples in Orange County towns, such as Newport Beach avoid prenuptial agreements for this exact reason even though they see the wisdom in it. Mediation provides the perfect circumstances for creating a premarital agreement in California.
The mediator you choose will facilitate an open discussion between you and your partner about different types of marital issues, including saving and spending styles, expectations about working once children are born, and traditional discussions about spousal support and property division if the marriage breaks down.
The mediator will deliver much-needed assistance to make sure engaged couples work productively towards making necessary decisions about how to handle things if there is a divorce or separation. You can always have an attorney review the premarital agreement once it is created.
It’s critical to note that premarital agreements developed through mediation are less stressful, less expensive, non-adversarial, faster, and mutually beneficial. You will make decisions as a couple, instead of becoming opposing adversaries in the ring.
Substantial changes to your finances can have an effect on alimony payments and child support. California laws makes use of a formula for identifying the amount of appropriate modification to the support when the work situation of either spouses change.
Other issues that qualify for changes to spousal and child support orders include:
You should speak with a trusted mediation specialist before making any unilateral decisions.
Mediators can address conflicts during estate planning process by conferring with individual family members confidentially and facilitating a collaborative process. You can clarify the needs and interests of individual members without violating any ethical rules by bringing in a mediator early during the estate planning process.
The utility of a mediator stems from the unique benefits they bring to the table, such as:
Mediators are unencumbered by the conflict-of-interest rules, which generally constrain estate planning attorneys. Mediators can easily uncover hidden interests and needs by communicating with each family member in confidence. The agreement protects the confidentiality of these conversations. The risk of candor is virtually eliminated, leaving individuals free to speak without the fear of the details getting shared with others in their absence or without their consent.
Mediators are uniquely positioned to obtain accurate and complete information from different parties. They can easily clear up misunderstandings and facilitate the healing of deep wounds or simmering resentment. Mediators work collaboratively with different family members for developing a conceptual approach that everyone feels comfortable with.
The mediator can help create a comprehensive picture of the unique situation in a manner similar to putting the pieces of a puzzle together. They can help family members take a holistic approach to addressing the conflict. Results of the mediation process can be used by advisors and estate planning attorney to prepare the necessary documents and develop appropriate legal structures.
The mediation process is transparent and even if mutual understandings fail to represent everyone’s ideal outcome, the opportunity for each member to weigh in, be heard, and vent plays an important role in reducing the risk of future legal challenges. As per the psychological principle of cognitive dissonance, a person is less likely to undermine or criticize a process in which they have invested substantial money, time, or energy.
Alternatively, when family members are not included in the estate planning process, they feel cheated by what they perceive as inequitable or unfair treatment under the trust or will. Litigation usually ensues since anger, distrust, and resentment takes over. In turn, the vitriol accompanying litigation can wreak permanent havoc on family relationships. There is also the issue of lasting embarrassment by airing the family’s “dirty laundry” in public.
The seasoned mediators at the Lerner Conflict Resolution Center have identified the following scenarios where mediation can be of use, especially in case of a sizeable estate:
Mediation can be useful in facilitating the estate planning or inheritance process by implementing a synergistic approach to conflict resolution between different family members. This is done through confidential dialogues and discussions that are free of ethical constraints. Mediation is different from litigation, which may be the only course left in its absence.
Mediation helps in preserving relationships, keeping family disputes private, promotes reconciliation and allows family members to control their futures.
The mediators at the Lerner Conflict Resolution Center have the necessary skills, experience, and resources to handle mediation related to prenuptial agreements, divorce and family law matters, estate planning conflicts, sibling issues, and other related concerns. Our team comprises of honest, compassionate, and dedicated experts that will help guide the conversation towards dispute resolution.
We have helped numerous families achieve acceptable resolutions, which earned us the trust of the clients and the communities. Our committed and empathetic mediators will work hard to help you and your family in resolving any concerns in an amicable manner to your satisfaction. To request a free consultation, call us at (949) 694-4245 or complete this online form.
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101 Pacifica #220 Irvine, CA 92618
14841 Yorba St, Tustin, CA 92780
Phone (949) 694-4245